Why is it that I can write easily about people or pets if I have just a little bit of distance from them, but if I have deep, loving complicated feelings about them it’s very hard? I had this experience trying to write an obituary for my mom, one of my big regrets, because I just couldn’t do it. I should have asked someone to help me, but my mind just wasn’t working properly and I was worried about the cost.
But never mind. I don’t need to write an obituary for Harper, but this blog post will actually BE her obituary! And I’ve got to do it. I loved her too much to not pay my respects.
Harper was a wonderful dog. She was the smartest dog I’ve ever known, at least for a Westie. She was also very confident and independent, also a very Westie attribute. She loved to be WITH you but never on you. She was not a lap dog, but she was a sit-right-beside-you-as-close-as-possible dog.
When we got Harper we did not really know that much about the best practices for training dogs. And because Harper was so headstrong, she was a challenging dog to train sometimes! But Diane, our wonderful breeder, helped us a lot. We took several training classes with her and Harper learned very well to sit, stay, COME! Walking politely on a leash was much harder and we never completely mastered it. And like a lot of Westies, Harper was very happy to chase a ball, but bringing it back and dropping it? That was hit or miss. She would do it if you had a treat, but if you tried to trick her she always knew if a treat was forthcoming or not. Too smart!
Harper loved both her people, but truth be told she loved Lee the most. In her younger years, when Lee was still working, he traveled for work frequently. Harper always knew when Lee was planning to leave. If the suitcase came out Harper would get very upset, crying and trying to plant herself in Lee’s baggage! He took to putting his suitcase in the car the night before, which helped.
When Harper was about 2 years old, we adopted Cosmo, a 5 month old Westie puppy, from Diane. Cosmo had an inflammatory bone disease so she couldn’t sell him, and she was too tender-hearted to euthanize him. Besides, it was a condition that with care, a dog could grow out of, so we took him instead.
Harper LOVED Cosmo! They had so much fun together. He was happy for her to be the boss and she loved having a silly funny sidekick to play with.
We had a sailboat and sailed up and down the New England coast, from Rockport, ME all the way to Newport, RI. The dogs loved it, and we did too.
Harper’s mother was Heather. When Diane retires her mamas she keeps some of them, but she can’t keep them all so she gives them to people she knows and trusts. Heather was the reason we had Harper in the first place. Diane used to hold open houses so people could meet her dogs and see if they were a good fit for them. We realized later that Diane was also checking out the people, deciding whether they were someone she would trust with her dogs. When Heather came trotting down the stairs that day, wagging her little Westie tail, so happy to greet everyone and get some pets, we were smitten! We knew we wanted one of Heather’s pups.
So when Heather was around 6 yo, she was retired. Lots of people wanted Heather, but Diane wanted us to take her. At first we did NOT want 3 dogs! But Diane waited us out. It took around 6 months but we finally caved and became a 3 dog family.
Harper’s reaction to Heather was much different from her reaction to Cosmo. She was NOT pleased. First of all, three dogs are suddenly a pack, and pack dynamics emerge. Harper had to make sure Heather knew her place, which was at the bottom of the pecking order.
Secondly, I think Harper didn’t like that Heather was a girl. I think it made Heather more of a threat to her dominance. AND she was jealous! She didn’t want to share Cosmo with Heather. Any time Cosmo and Heather would start to play together Harper would break it up. Poor Heather.
Eventually Harper relented and stopped being so mean. People used to ask us if they knew that they were mother and daughter. I always said how in the world would I know! Ha.
We acquired an RV and that was another very fun thing to do with the dogs. We traveled all over; to the midwest to visit family and friends, to Canada, and eventually down to Florida every winter. The dogs had a great time and so did we.
When Harper was almost 9 year old we moved to Minnesota to be closer to family, especially our new grandson Leo. It was hard to leave New England but it was time.
Harper took to our new environment easily. She was always very accommodating in that respect. She handled the year in our rental house and then the move to our new house with aplomb. That was Harper!
But age started creeping in, alas. She lost her hearing. She had ccl surgery at 13 yo and came through that with flying colors. But her arthritis made it hard to go on walks even though she still wanted to. Cosmo passed away, and then Heather did as well. We got a new puppy, Sophie, and Harper was happy, but didn’t really have the strength or energy to play with her very much.
Then she started to lose her sight, and developed a neurological disorder that made her twitch. Then she started having recurrent bouts of diarrhea. We put her on antibiotics, and it would clear up, but if we tried to stop the medication it would come back.
On February 23rd Harper had a very bad day. She was in pain and couldn’t get comfortable. We knew it was time. On February 24th we went to the vet and said goodbye. So very hard and so very necessary.
The will never be another Harper. We both have mixed feelings about her death. We are heartbroken and at the same time kind of relieved that she is no longer in pain or suffering. And of course we’re grateful. What an amazing experience to have such an incredible dog grace our lives for over 16 years! I feel very very lucky.
Rest in peace, Harper darling. See you at the rainbow bridge, someday.
